A Guide for Managers and Leaders: How to Manage Conflict
How to manage conflict is a core management skill that is seldom developed for many leaders. Below we discuss some easy steps for managers to be able to effectively manage conflict.
A survey conducted by Accountemps in 2011 concluded that leaders on average spend 16% of their time trying to manage conflict. Given this amount of effort, organizations already spend a great deal of time and money to manage conflict. Presumably those organizations and the leaders there would want to ensure that they manage conflict well.
The Avoidance Myth
Many leaders erroneously believe that avoidance is the best way to manage conflict. This is not true. In fact, avoiding and yielding responses to manage conflict can be extraordinarily harmful. Conflict is inevitable in any workplace, and is neither good nor bad, but rather how people manage conflict can make the situation better or worse.
4 Keys to Properly Manage Conflict
Below are four key elements to effectively manage conflict.
1. Know when to act.
2. Focus on specific behaviours, not individual person(s)
3. Be self-aware
4. Move forward
Know When to Act to Properly Manage Conflict
Sometimes leaders need to take decisive action when attempting to manage conflict. Other times they should ignore a situation:
• Respond to serious conflict, and avoid petty grievances. People should be told to sort out their own problems when they are of a minor nature.
• If there will be a significant affect on morale or productivity – deal with it.
• Certainly act if there is any potential for harassment or violence.
Focus on Specific Behaviours, and not on Individual Person(s) to Properly Manage Conflict
As a manager, you must rise above personality conflicts when trying to manage conflict:
• You need to deal with problem people, but in the context of their behaviour or the situation.
• Take note of observable or measurable actions.
• Be aware of both passive and active reactions to conflict. In other words, sometimes you may be better off to take note of a situation, and deal with the conflict when you have more and better information.
Be Self-aware
You are a manager who has a responsibility to manage conflict, but you are also a person who is subject to thoughts and emotion. Make sure you are self-aware:
• What is the impact of this conflict on you?
• What people or situations are most likely to “push your buttons”?
• Try to understand why and how the conflict is occurring.
• Know there is a “moment of choice” that will either resolve or escalate the conflict
Move Forward
In order properly manage conflict, there must be some kind of resolution. In other words, something must happen differently going forward than has happened in the past:
• Ensure everyone knows what will be different going forward.
• Who will do what by when to achieve resolution?
3 Things to Remember to Properly Manage Conflict
1. Deal with conflict – do not avoid it. It will not resolve itself, and the longer you leave things as they are, the worse it will get.
2. Don’t minimize the impact on you. Be aware of the emotions at play when handling conflict, and how they may impact your judgment and action.
3. Don’t make it personal. Always deal with the situation, rather than attacking the person, and conversely remember that someone who is attacking you, is likely not attacking the person.
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